Two things

Make that three...

1. My last day of work (for a few weeks) was blissful! I just love Christmas time--AND I got to work with a group of students as the teacher (I haven't done a full session in a few months!). It was rad. I love students.

2. I found out that, most likely, unless I am willing to travel during the in-between times of being in Brush after January, I need to find a new job. *Sigh*

3. Last night I was freaking out. I seriously think I almost had an anxiety attack (self-induced). Eek, sometimes I frustrate myself so incredibly! Essentially, as I talked to my dad, he updated me on the horrible weather in Washington--high winds in Seattle, masses of snow in the mountains, etc., and that same old fear plunged into my heart again. Oh, how frustrating! I felt almost paralyzed with fear--fear of death. Fear that my dad would get hurt or killed. That our drive would be disastrous. Etc. Etc. Etc. Can you imagine me just standing in the bathroom, toothbrush in mouth, WORRYING about stupid events that COULD happen but haven't? I was practically making myself cry and freak out over what COULD happen.

Never do I intend not to trust the Lord. I want to trust him! And I do when I am sane, like now. But last night I could hardly believe myself when I said "I trust you, Lord."

However, I was reminded of the most beautiful truth on earth. I was even chastened about it (and I needed it). No matter what happens, if my dad gets hurt or killed, or I get in a severe accident, or someone I love gets cancer, the one phrase that must never leave my heart and lips is "Praise God." Praise God. Praise God. Praise God. He is the author.

Honestly, I HATE death. I HATE IT. PRAISE GOD that He defeated it! If it wasn't for Jesus Christ, I would be hopeless and remain consumed by my fear of death. But NO MORE!